Muhibbah-ism.
Tagged from A Voice: Discuss an aspect of Muhibbah – what and why – and offer how we as individuals can promote Muhibbah. Try not to be too political and blame Government mode.
Thanks, bro. Here’s my two sen.
Muhibbah-ism.
First of all, I don’t believe in gawd. So much so, I don’t even type the word. Neither do I preach atheism. I have friends of all faiths, none of them have I ever fallen out with because we failed to understand each others’ beliefs. Faith to me, you see, has never been a factor in summing up a person, let alone a friend. I respect those who can’t eat pork because they are Muslims and I do not do so in their presence. But there has been instances where they feel slighted when I’m not willing to compromise on eating my char siew rice. So where do we draw the line in accepting each others beliefs and preferences before we become borderline ‘racists’ or ‘theists’?
Religion has always been tricky. While I try my best not to judge others, I on the other hand have been judged pretty badly. From being called ungawdly to demon-worshipper, I normally sit back and let those words bounce of me. It merely strengthens my views that religion continues to blind many and separates people.
Race is also another tricky question. I’ve been told I’m not Chinese enough. I’ve had problems with the language, with my dialect and with the way I carry myself. It’s fascinating how so many factors - from my parents background to the way I was raised - can differentiate my Malaysianess from yours. But embracing that difference has always been problem with all of us, I for one, love how we are so different and yet so alike. But there are just people who are obsessive with similarities and fail to leap out of their comfort zone.
Then there’s language, education background, geographical locations, professions and so many other factors that people can’t see beyond. I’ve shared my past and maybe some ideas for solutions are in order.
So where do we stand in terms of how muhibbah we are - I’m not sure myself but I most certainly remain hopeful.
I think the first step is to look beyond stereotypes. My approach has always been to correct individuals around me who make racist comments. We either don’t make them at all or we make them in jest and take it all in good spirits. I can say all Indian girls smell like coconut without feeling that was racist because they do and I love the smell of coconuts. I understand it is their faith or custom and I respect it. The onus is also on them to not take it to heart because we need to deconstruct these stereotypes and laugh them away. It’s not insulting if we don’t feel it.
I’ve been called a chink and a Japanese cunt by drunken Brits. I laughed and said thanks. What does that show about their moral fibre? And what does it show for mine?
We all don’t mix with other races enough. I think I have had the fortune to be in a more mixed public school in PJ. My best mates today remain Malay and Chinese. My first best friend was Indian. I’m dating a one-eight Indian-Chinese (betcha didn’t know that about Nat. lol). I say ‘insyallah’. I’ve been to churches, temples, mosques, synagogues and tokongs. I’ve attended weddings and funerals of all races. I try my best to correct people around me when they make racial slurs. I once wore a baju kurung and a pottu for a wedding dinner. In sum, I try to experience the cultures and habits of other races. And when I try, I try my best.
I can only hope for others to do the same. That’s the only way I know in suggesting how others can embrace the spirit of muhibbah. To step outside their comfort zone of their languages, race, religion and background and meet people. Start with your neighbours. Then on the road. When you see a bad driver, that’s all the person is. Not a ‘lousy Malay woman driver with a Penang plate’. Then the people you meet at work. Get to know the tea lady or the canteen operator. If you can’t stomach politics then talk about other things - food, places, movies, music, anything. From similarities, move into our differences. We must learn to understand other people first before we voice our personal views. Next, move beyond Malaysians, start treating non-Malaysians with the same courtesy.
I don’t blame the government in its entirety. I most certainly have issues with the education syllabus and how race-based politics have divided many of us. Our system is inherently racist and it all began with the Federal Constitution and later the New Economic Policy. But the fault lies largely with ourselves, if not our parents and their parents. It is hard to break the mould and I think the only way to do just that is through self-realisation. Now that is of course a tad difficult since we are all brought up in the racist and discriminatory system but hey - one just needs to look inwards and find out for themselves.
I seek to inspire because I don’t think it is my right to change people and their views. So we disagree on politics but we don’t use race as a factor (unless race is what we’re disagreeing on!) So I’m here sharing as usual and hope it enlightens whoever out there that may be touched somehow by my words. This is the part that I play in society, I guess.
What matters most is what part will you play? Share, you know I love sharings :)
I tag all of you, I’d love to hear everybody’s view about muhibbah-ism :) If it’s negative, we’ll try to address it. If it’s positive then let’s try to inspire others. I believe in collective effort. Nothing is ever the battle of one person alone.
January 31st, 2008 at 10:32 pm
It is the reasons you divulge that I find it hard to believe that any political group in Msia will run the country with equal rights for everyone.
As said in previous posts, the scales may tip a little more evenly in the coming election, but the thinking remains the same. I think most parties have no choice BUT to play the racial/religious card in order to get votes. :( Still no parties out there shouting loud and clear that they represent the ordinary Msian.
I too have multi culti friends, celebrations etc. However, stereotyping is very hard to get rid of, esp when children ape their parents and apply the stereotypes to who they see.
Sadly enough, the people I know growing up believed the stereotype and while they are higly educated working professionals now, they still beleive in the stereotype because of their parents.
The bottom line is that when a race feels threatened or in the minority, they hug their beliefs, religion and culture more and more and think theirs is superior than the rest. It’s an ugly side of human nature.
Where and when can we start to change the way we think?
Probably when one race schools are gone, when Moral classes at school encourage multi culti mixing in school, when children are smart and brave enough to point out to their parents that their mom or dad shouldn’t say something stereotypical because stereotyping is bad, and finally when kids find out that every other kid in their class (regardless of skin/race/colour) is exactly like them and then we pray their innocent minds don’t get poisoned by our society.
It all starts with our kids.
February 1st, 2008 at 12:47 am
thanks for sharing, chevy :)
February 1st, 2008 at 8:57 am
Your idea of trying to embrace other cultures is a truly unique proposal. As you say, “step outside our comfort zone.” Certainly we must allow and helped each other to step outside the comfort zone. In the course of trying to help so, we must understand, accept and tolerate the limitations some may have … I can only think of dietary restriction right now.
Actually stereotyping arise from bad categorisation or profiling that perpetuated itself. It has to start with all of us correcting all these wrongful generalisation, or in your preferred way, “seek to inspire”. If stereotyping has been really an ingrained problem, I wonder why the Jabatan Perpaduan Kaum dan Integrasi Nasional has not put up a good campaign to educate people on stereotyping and suggest the ways and means to stop that.
Really … we have to think beyond partisan politics to solve problems and achieve the objectives of our causes in economics, social, religious, community etc. To see our business objective met, we get involved with politicans and their workings.
Every other person from community to activist, businessmen and off course politicians are taking partisan politics as the only ways and means to achieve their objective and goals. I don;t blame them, judging by how partisan we are.
By the time they actually reached the desired position, the objective and goals of their involvement gets muddle and they end up with mud all over. Not to mentioned of those without any depth and capacity to comprehend politics that get manipulated and used in the process.It is time politicians be put to the role they truly should be …. as servant of the people.
If we are able to see the ways and means beyond partisan politics, it can be a truly effective source for change. Non partisan politics politics.
February 1st, 2008 at 9:33 am
Hi Tsin, interesting topic, as are the past few posts. Would like to be involved in the discussion but i’m flat out atm. Will chat to you when I see you next week k? When I’m on hols tomorrow, I’ll devote time to spamming your blog :D Wheeeeeee!
February 5th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
kinda impossible not to include politics don’t you think? i’m from the 3rd generation so it has everything to do with politics because we have let it lead and suffocate us with its absurdity. i am born into NEP and being told there’s indeed a superior race and religion other than my own, my whole environment and experience has been submerged with signs, news, symbols and even still-living-bigots who kept telling me I’m a Infidel/Kaffir who are inferior in every way. i’m born into thinking NEP was suppose to help the poor regardless of color of the skin/ race & religion but I found out even the Rich & Mighty still gets a huge slice and benefited from it while the real poor goes unabate. For every cent we contirbuted in taxes, the Greedy & Wicked gets more ravenous with the offerings. And everytime they’ve been caught, they wriggle themselves free with assistance from the administrative puppets who serves not the people but its true Masters.
Muhubbahism comes from genuine realisation we are neighbours, friends, lovers and citizens of one country, we have no one but the ones on your left & right to help ourselves. Politics segregate us like cows and sheeps going to the abattoir, and to reinforce the notion & belief only they have the answer. As long as there are race-based politics, Muhibbahism will remain buried and sealed.
p/s: Nat is a 1/8ter? How do you explain that?lolx
February 6th, 2008 at 1:35 am
i totally agree with you mobster. nat? his mom is a quarter indian so that makes nat one-eighth indian. lol. wait til you see what his mykad says on the astro decoder! :)