Muhibbah-ism.
Tagged from A Voice: Discuss an aspect of Muhibbah – what and why – and offer how we as individuals can promote Muhibbah. Try not to be too political and blame Government mode.
Thanks, bro. Here’s my two sen.
Muhibbah-ism.
First of all, I don’t believe in gawd. So much so, I don’t even type the word. Neither do I preach atheism. I have friends of all faiths, none of them have I ever fallen out with because we failed to understand each others’ beliefs. Faith to me, you see, has never been a factor in summing up a person, let alone a friend. I respect those who can’t eat pork because they are Muslims and I do not do so in their presence. But there has been instances where they feel slighted when I’m not willing to compromise on eating my char siew rice. So where do we draw the line in accepting each others beliefs and preferences before we become borderline ‘racists’ or ‘theists’?
Religion has always been tricky. While I try my best not to judge others, I on the other hand have been judged pretty badly. From being called ungawdly to demon-worshipper, I normally sit back and let those words bounce of me. It merely strengthens my views that religion continues to blind many and separates people.
Race is also another tricky question. I’ve been told I’m not Chinese enough. I’ve had problems with the language, with my dialect and with the way I carry myself. It’s fascinating how so many factors - from my parents background to the way I was raised - can differentiate my Malaysianess from yours. But embracing that difference has always been problem with all of us, I for one, love how we are so different and yet so alike. But there are just people who are obsessive with similarities and fail to leap out of their comfort zone.
Then there’s language, education background, geographical locations, professions and so many other factors that people can’t see beyond. I’ve shared my past and maybe some ideas for solutions are in order.
So where do we stand in terms of how muhibbah we are - I’m not sure myself but I most certainly remain hopeful.
I think the first step is to look beyond stereotypes. My approach has always been to correct individuals around me who make racist comments. We either don’t make them at all or we make them in jest and take it all in good spirits. I can say all Indian girls smell like coconut without feeling that was racist because they do and I love the smell of coconuts. I understand it is their faith or custom and I respect it. The onus is also on them to not take it to heart because we need to deconstruct these stereotypes and laugh them away. It’s not insulting if we don’t feel it.
I’ve been called a chink and a Japanese cunt by drunken Brits. I laughed and said thanks. What does that show about their moral fibre? And what does it show for mine?
We all don’t mix with other races enough. I think I have had the fortune to be in a more mixed public school in PJ. My best mates today remain Malay and Chinese. My first best friend was Indian. I’m dating a one-eight Indian-Chinese (betcha didn’t know that about Nat. lol). I say ‘insyallah’. I’ve been to churches, temples, mosques, synagogues and tokongs. I’ve attended weddings and funerals of all races. I try my best to correct people around me when they make racial slurs. I once wore a baju kurung and a pottu for a wedding dinner. In sum, I try to experience the cultures and habits of other races. And when I try, I try my best.
I can only hope for others to do the same. That’s the only way I know in suggesting how others can embrace the spirit of muhibbah. To step outside their comfort zone of their languages, race, religion and background and meet people. Start with your neighbours. Then on the road. When you see a bad driver, that’s all the person is. Not a ‘lousy Malay woman driver with a Penang plate’. Then the people you meet at work. Get to know the tea lady or the canteen operator. If you can’t stomach politics then talk about other things - food, places, movies, music, anything. From similarities, move into our differences. We must learn to understand other people first before we voice our personal views. Next, move beyond Malaysians, start treating non-Malaysians with the same courtesy.
I don’t blame the government in its entirety. I most certainly have issues with the education syllabus and how race-based politics have divided many of us. Our system is inherently racist and it all began with the Federal Constitution and later the New Economic Policy. But the fault lies largely with ourselves, if not our parents and their parents. It is hard to break the mould and I think the only way to do just that is through self-realisation. Now that is of course a tad difficult since we are all brought up in the racist and discriminatory system but hey - one just needs to look inwards and find out for themselves.
I seek to inspire because I don’t think it is my right to change people and their views. So we disagree on politics but we don’t use race as a factor (unless race is what we’re disagreeing on!) So I’m here sharing as usual and hope it enlightens whoever out there that may be touched somehow by my words. This is the part that I play in society, I guess.
What matters most is what part will you play? Share, you know I love sharings :)
I tag all of you, I’d love to hear everybody’s view about muhibbah-ism :) If it’s negative, we’ll try to address it. If it’s positive then let’s try to inspire others. I believe in collective effort. Nothing is ever the battle of one person alone.